Change Lives

Change Lives

Sunday, 12 April 2015

Losing My Nemesis.....

A really sad time today as we had to say goodbye to a dog that was such a big part of this charity and our day to day life. Despite being full of life and playing with his boomer ball yesterday, cancer won it's fight against the very brave Lewis this morning.

Lewis was an enigma, a one off and also my nemesis.  The only dog whose trust I never completely gained, but then his past was so bad that he didn't trust anyone. We worked around that though, and whilst my body carries some scars as a reminder of his fear, I'd like to think that by the end we had a mutual respect.

This morning was very difficult, days like today are never easy, and with Lewis's history it made it even more so. But I have to say my team where incredible despite their hearts being visibly ripped in two. Nobody panicked, nobody lost the plot, everybody stayed focused on what we needed to do for the best for Lewis.  For that both me and him will be eternally grateful.

Lewis as I have said left permanent reminders on my body that now serve like tattoos regarding someone that was close and lost. That's how I like to think of them anyway. In reality they are marks from a dog that was so badly damaged by humans he shut himself off to everyone apart from his cuddly toys and his boomer ball. He warmed to us over the years, and I'd like to think that he trusted us even if just a little by the end. One thing is we didn't give up on him and take the easy option..... that is something I am very proud of.

I remember the first time that I suffered at the hands of his fear, as I drove myself to casualty a Biffy Clyro song came on  the cd. The words were perfect for that moment..... perfect for what had just happened and how our relationship now was.....

"You say "I love you, boy"
I know you lie
I trust you all the same
I don't know why

'Cause when my back is turned
My bruises shine
Our broken fairytale
So hard to hide

I still believe it's you and me 'til the end of time

When we collide we come together
If we don't we'll always be apart
I'll take a bruise; I know you're worth it
When you hit me hit me hard."

All the bruises were certainly worth it, and I guess today was the end of time. And we were together.

I will miss you Lewis.  We will all miss you. I hope now you know how much we loved you.